When you were there......

"I am scared of you". Her voice was cold. He was speechless for next 60 seconds. She continued, I am scared that you will change. I am scared that you will not feel the same for me that you feel now or felt before. He was listening quietly, trying to comprehend the words.

I have seen you changing and changing very quickly. What I know you and had known has been shaken and moulded into something else. Unpleasantly you have become a different person than that I love. I still love you and will continue loving you, but the warmth in your embrace isn't there. The feel in your touch isn't there. Now you don't bring flowers for me, no cards, no special words. You don't compliment me anymore. Not that I need them to live but................You never got tired doing all of it.

Even the surprises are not coming. I wonder if that is your way of another surprise. I feel that you were walking next to me, holding my hand and suddenly you zoomed ahead and do not care to look behind. Look behind to see how far I am left, how much I need to cover.

I have to match your pace ................... I have to look where are you do, I have to be what you have become. I have to feel happy when you do, I have to feel sorry when you don't. I have to make love when you want to, I have to sleep on the edge now, I have to travel alone, I have to eat alone, I have to .....................



I run and hold your hand again, it doesn't touch you. You are still looking at the place YOU want to go. You are still looking in that direction. You don't look at me anymore. I dressed in your fav color, wore a lip layer, black lined my brows. You liked me that way, didn't you?

You don't open the door of the car for me anymore, you used to rush in front of me and chivalrously bow and direct me to the seat. Ensuring I had my clothes off the ground, you gently closed the door. Not that I want you to....... You always did it yourself.

You don't face me while sleeping anymore, don't kiss me morning, don't kiss me night.



He was still speechless, trying to figure out when had that happened. Actually !! He was amazed to have not seen it. He knew it was him that she was comparing him with, and she sounded right. He didn't interrupt, he felt she had so much to say.

She was waiting for him to say something. "Would you say something".....ah...umm....huh......Yeah you are right! I have changed. And he silenced himself again. She wanted me to say something, I just said "something".

"No, Honey I have not changed, its just the work. I have this project coming up."

"NO, honey I haven't changed, its just that I am not feeling good, and there is no one else."

This is not what she wants to hear, this is not what she wants to know. She know it already, she knows that you have changed, she knows it IS work, She knows it is NOT OTHER WOMAN.

So why is she telling it to me??

Coz she is insecure, she is about to spend the entire life with someone she thought she knew. and now you are nothing understandable to her. She is coming out of her family holding your hand, trusting your words, trusting you, trusting her instincts that she will be well with this man. But, now she doesn't feel the same way.




You don't feel right to him, the trust has changed. The thoughts started to hit him hard now. Suddenly he looked back and realized he had left her behind, long behind. She was standing alone calling out his name while he was somewhere looking for HIS destination.


He started to speak now, started to say the same words he used to say to her. Started to make her feel, he hasn't changed a bit. He can still bring flowers, he can still buy the cards, He can still surprise her, He can still say those special words.

He started to speak like he used to, slowly he was felt near to her. He felt like walking aside, holding hands. Slowly she started to feel he is still the same, its just that he needs a gently push, a call from behind, a poke.....a pinch. A reminder about himself, what he is and should stay. Why she is with him and why she would want to be with him.


She needs to feel right about choosing him as his man, She needs to feel secure in his arms, She has left a world for him, he needs to make her feel correct with her decision. And saying won't work, doing won't work. She will feel it. Just be what she wants you to be... and she will give you all that she has.


Listening to him.....calm.....She drifted to sleep.