Irony of a Husband....

The irony of a husband is that he is nothing less and nothing more. He has been built, set, formed, transformed, to act, behave, live, nurture like a Husband. He knows nothing else in life.

Husbands are like having fat people picked up and made Santas on Christmas. Why, do we pick Fat people? Because we know Santa is fat. Husbands.................................... are typical.

A husband is likely to fit in a well set frame, a pre-define area, a cliche environment. Lets write down the characteristics of a husband.


* He will drive recklessly and would always make you realize that while you are with him on the two-wheeler, you start to believe in Almighty. You would shout, you would curse, you would say firmly to not drive like that. You will clinch the Back rest hard, You will grab the kid with all might and ...... He would drive safely for next 100 Meters .......

You would stop saying anything after a month. He would continue to drive the same way.....you will close your eyes and hope to live.

* He will hug you like a father and kiss your forehead in a way only a "Husband" will. His touch will always be pleasant, may not be special. But you will be OK with it. After all he is your husband.


* He will drink too much in parties and then blabber all out. You have to carry him back home with kids and worry more over the first point...the driving. Next morning you ask him not to drink too much and he promises not to. The next party he drinks more and all the F**king words would come out. The kids are listening to it, so is your Mother-in-Law and so are you. The next morning you would have a huge fight and he swears not to have it anymore. After next party....you stop saying anything about Alcohol too.

* He will have a huge poncho ( size may vary ) and will be very lazy after five years of marriage. You will have to run him around to get chores done or better do them yourself. He is just as good to earn big bucks and fill the house with furniture.

* He will fight with the Rickshaw puller for Change. While you will hold kid in your arms and watch your husband win or loose 5 bucks. And also explain to your kid why "DAD" is shouting. You would wonder what to say to kids at that time.

* He will be real clumsy while eating and gluttony will be all over his clothes.

* He would always Tie the Tie in a lousy way.

* His shirt will never be tucked inside the trousers nicely.

* He will have that receding hairline and a growing stomach.

* He will shave once in 15 days, sometimes even longer.

* He will never open the car door for you. In fact he will sit much before and start honking.

* He will always walk ahead and curse you to not walk fast enough.

* He will hardly compliment you and hardly care how you look after 5 years of marriage.

* He would stop bringing you flowers or gifts few months after marriage.

* He would always park in NO PARKING, Drive Wrong Lane, Overtake in a Crowded place, Honk and Shout uncontrollably and take you from the filthiest place in the city claiming that it is the best shortcut.

* He would never carry a Handkerchief.

* He would stop the car / bike and pee roadside while you are sitting in / next to vehicle thinking about the Hygiene.

* He will not have breakfast to avoid getting late to office, but comes back half way to collect his wallet.


There are so many other characteristics, so typical to a husband but you would still not be embarrassed ( this may vary ). He will still mean the world to you and you will be proud ( sometimes, may be ) to call him your husband.

He will be a good father, a good Son-in-Law. He would attend his in-laws and be a good host. He would be loved by everyone and people from both families would come and seek advice.

Ohhh....he would be so HUSBAND at times......at all times. His hug would always make you feel secure. His anger would never make you guilty, rather would irritate. Yet he will be "YOUR PROUD HUSBAND". He will make love in a manner that you would not feel special but would still let him have it, coz you think its his right. He will never change, even after 30 years of marriage and would always make you realize that you are married to him and not the other way round.

You would love him, and will get used to his antics and non-sense. You would cherish him few years down the line and may be start to love him more as a person rather a husband. Yet..

THE IRONY OF A HUSBAND IS,........ THAT HE IS SOOOOOOO HUSBAND.

Walking down past lanes.....

Hadn't been long since I visited home. Exactly after a month I was back at my birth place. The moment I exited the flight, Delhi's chilly air pinched my face.

Normally that will tell me, Home Sweet Home. Called up Dad, and he was outside waiting. Off the driver seat, he went to rear seats, "I am not gonna wear a seat belt", he said. Mom was still smiling, I had to tell her...Yeah its me MA !!!..

Driving on Delhi roads is a pleasure. Always made me said, God I missed you roads...So much. Driving my own car, driving on own lanes. It was coming back home.

Spent the day in lethargy, most of it. Had to get the car serviced. When it was time to pick the wagon up, I decided to walk to the workshop as it was mere 1.5 km. Can't remember the count since I walked that much, or walked even a tenth of it. It was getting dark. Close to 7 PM IST, winters.

Suddenly I became a bit more observant than I normally am. Things in dark were apparenly looking clearer. Walked down the staircase of the house and in the small lane I have my flats. Have been living here from past 21 years. Have seen people coming as kids in neighbours, graduating, getting married and having kids. 21 years in that house, in that lane.....It always FELT nostalgic.

Just after 10 steps ( 10 steps away from my house ) I realized I was new here. The guy I used to see running around with a school bag, may be he was 5-6 years old had a mustassh now. He was looking a teenager by his glare at me. I smiled at him, almost saying, you are the same guy I used to caution, "Get off the playground or you will get hurt". May be he dint hear my smile...........He never blinked.

I can't believe she's grown up so much. She was the size of my hand. Goodness Gracious....what a charming lady she is turning into. She would not even recognize me. The young teenager next door has got a motorbike, long hair, ear ring and a Stud look. hmmm.......seems to work out as well. Whoaaa..... even this one didn't blink.

Hmmmmm....interesting. 20 more steps I was out of my lane and could not see my house. Still to get out of the vicinity some 5-6 lanes more were left. I've spent my childhood here, I was murmuring to myself. This used to be our hangout, I spilled my coke there, We won that tight match over there. She was standing right there with her father, she was wearing.......... She looked....................

We raced bicycles in this one, and raced on foot in that one. I was pointing fingers to each and talking to myself. The temple had grown to two more storeys since I last remember. I used to play in the building material when this thing was still a foundation.
One of my cricket friends used to live in that house, what was the name????....uuummmmmmmmm....

The school bus dropped me here and 6 am I used to get here all dressed up to be picked. Mom waited till I waved from the window......

I used to jog in that ground with Divesh, now Flying Lieutinant Divesh Pankaj. I had the road side omlette here with Amar...now Dr. Amardeep Angoorla M.D (US).

Out of the society I moved to the main road. That old uncle still runs that grocery shop, The Letter box is still there, needs a paint. The tree grew longer. Suddenly a car took a sharp turn near to my feet. KIDS...I said.....

Loud music, tinted glasses......zig-zag driving.......... Been there, done that. But it was still not feeling nostalgic.

Street light were on and so was the moon. Day was over. I could still see things clearly. That bump in the road is where I stumbled when a pimp approached me. The conversation started with, "What's the time?", carried on to "what do you do?", built to "What are your INTERESTS?"....and ended with "30 bucks for 15 minutes job, ...she will be good". That is when I stumbled. He was half my height and I was still in first year.

The small house I always liked and admired to have one similar was now a 6 storey building that read "Jhankar Banquet Hall" with lights all over it. The crowd on this road has increased, I was getting louder. Ohh...the petrol pump did actually complete and we have new society too. (still saying aloud ) The School has got another floor, got a paint too. The pool and snooker joint is a restaurant now. The Gym reads Closed. I did think it wouldn't last long. After all people like me used to come here.

Unrealizable, I was almost there at the workshop, I will get my car in while and then I will drive all the way back, same I just covered on foot. I don't know if the feeling would be any different sitting inside a four wheeler.

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Walking those past lanes......... I never felt I was back home.

What is Life !!!! ....They are.

There is a famous saying "God speaks from a kid's mouth". Sometimes you are made to believe it is true.

A 5 year old girl playing in my lap while I talk to my female friend I have started to get interested in suddenly shoots up and says " You are talking to your wife, Right!!!" It was never a question. She wouldn't even know what wife means but she said as if she knew we are getting married.

Somehow the kids just know it. They would call a perfect stranger thief, bad uncle, some movie villain. And sometimes they would just come and hug and a peck on the cheek followed by " you just became my friend". Hello!!! Did I ask for it? Do I want to be your friend? How on earth does the kid know that I wanted to lift her the very moment I saw her? How on earth would she know that a complete stranger she called some baddie, actually is? How on earth would she know what is going to happen? And they just say that, out of nowhere, THEY JUST SAY THAT.
They would tell you what even you can't sense, they would see what you won't see, they can foresee what even you can't. They will sometimes lead you out of your misery.

Kids indeed are mark of God. The tiniest part of life, is actually the biggest impact. Those tiny little hands when hold you, embrace just half of your body, kiss you on the cheek, look at you with THOSE eyes...the whole body crumbles, the soul starts to melt.

I am very fond of kids, somehow they also like me ( am I Blessed or am I BLESSED !! ). May be because there is always a kid in me too. The innocence of the antics, the smile on their fall, the warmth of their touch, the bundle of energy across the room, on the couch, rolling on the floor, jumping on the bed......THIS MY FRIEND IS LIFE.

and Life at its best. Kids can make you forget everything, they can make you laugh without even knowing they want to. They can make you cry by just a look, the look of life asking you to pick her up in your arms. They can make you angry with yourself when they would be awake late night just to see you and whisper in your ear " Dad, why don't you quit that job, they make you work too much". and Just then you realize you were actually partying late. Imagine the heart cry out loud the moment you see your kid asking something like that to you. Imagine the smile they would give you while you leave for office, makes my day always. Imagine how they look up to you as an example, as someone to follow, and you come back home drunk. Imagine you coughing cigarettes and they would give you their cough syrup. "Dad, have this! It will cure you. Imagine being the speaker who could move the masses by his words and becoming speechless when his kid asks, "Dad why do you and mom fight every night?.


Ohh..my God....I feel like crying till I give up. They can make the heartless, FEEL. They can make any pain go away. They will come and wipe your tears and say the same words you would say when they had a fall. "Dad, you are a brave boy, Right ??? You should not cry. Good boys never cry.

They are the most powerful beings on this planet and will always be. If there is any solace, any innocence left in this life then believe me you will only get with them.

Those little things are what matters to me most in my life. Not just mine. Not just a girl child. Being a father I am of course biased, but boys can sometimes be cute too. Always wanted to adopt one, still do...REALLY. I hope to fulfill my dream someday, may be soon.

The Tiniest form of life is ......actually the biggest one.

Can't write anymore.........time out.

Just Another Human.....

I have escaped death, at least more than 8 times. Would sound filmy but indeed I have. From being blown into pieces by a head-on collision by a Bus, to being drowned in a 7 feet lake near World's Highest(Altitude) Temple, from falling off 3209 Metres peak in the Himalayas, to being sandwiched between two speeding trucks at wee hours. Not to mention I was scratch less
in all above.

Have had my falls from buildings and yet gotten up to resume the game I was playing on the roof. Have been right in front of tip of 21" Dagger and a home made pistol, again ..........coming out scratch less.

Tried taking my life by not breathing my next breath at the age of 13, though I later realized one can never take one's life
like that.


All the above happened while I was still a teenager, telling me a lot about life and post-life things so early. Do I value my and others' lives more ( would be an obvious answer !!! ) ? No, I DO NOT.
Do I think myself immortal? NEVER !!! Does it all makes me a reckless fearless Driver. Fearless maybe, Reckless! absolutely not.

What it does indeed made me change my view to, was towards Destiny. I have always had my debates against the whole concept of what ever happens, happens coz of destiny. A person shot himself and the world would say, he was destined to die like that. Oh...C'mon ...the man just shot himself. Don't you see!! he chose to. He chose to do what he wanted to do with his life,
nothing happened like a pre-written script of the movie.

But, I was utterly wrong. Destiny stands between lot many things that you can get, and you eventually get. I would stand first in the class, if I study hard. I studied, and studied and studied and I stood first. Wow!!! I made my destiny. I studied and studied and studied and I fell too ill to even attempt my exam. I flunked. Wow!! Did I again....made my destiny?

There is huge difference between things being destined and things being circumstantial. If you can turn circumstantial things your own way, you have made your destiny ( and that is absolutely correct term to use ), but you can't twist / turn / evade / sway / escape what is destined to happen. Sometimes you just can't.

For whatever happens, happens for the good. I believe in it, always did....FIRMLY. Not being an optimist but I have had reasons to believe, some of them are right in the start of this post, and many others are the SIGNS life will show to you. I have been lucky for a lot of friends, escaping injuries. One of them was my dear school mate ( the now India's youngest Fighter Pilot, I dedicated one of my recent post to) when he could have been cut into two pieces by a torpedo Javelin thrown while practising for annual athletics while we were playing in middle of the ground. The javelin, ripped off his boot.........but HE WAS SCRATCH LESS.

Sitting behind College mates, I have had near close shaves while overtaking, speeding, reckless driving. Been the alarm to accidents I saw would happen, could happen and has evaded many injuries just because I was there at the right time. What does this all tell me? What does it all mean? Does it mean I am extremely lucky? Does it mean I have sixth sense? Does it mean I am immortal ? None of it, just none of it. I am what God has made me and living my life just like anyone else.

Knowing I won't die in a crash or a mishap doesn't make me feel good or special. Knowing sitting behind my rash driving friends on a bike won't let anything happen to them doesn't make me feel like super power. Knowing that what ever happens, happens for Good doesn't make me an escapist or a coward. Knowing that no matter how hard you try sometimes you have to leave it on HIM, doesn't make me weak.

I am a person next door, bleed when cut, cry when hurt, laugh when jovial, dance with joy.
and I like being that and I am proud to say


I am ...............................JUST ANOTHER HUMAN